Sometimes our hearts break for strangers......

Yesterday I found out something that for some reason just broke my heart. I found out that one of Tyler's exes mom has cancer and things don't look so good for her. For some reason this hit me so hard, and I felt so bad for this girl and her brother. I've never met this girl in my life. I know nothing about her except for the few things Tyler has told me. I've known people who have had family members that had cancer. I've had family members that have had cancer. My grandfather died of lung cancer. Obviously, when he died I was very upset, but why am I so heartbroken for this girl that I don't even know. I don't know if it's because of how very in touch I have been with my feelings lately or if it's something else. All I know is when I found this out I started crying. All I could think about was how horrible that must be. I thought about what I would do if it was my mother. Not knowing for sure if she was going to live or die. Or knowing that she was dying and just having to wait. I can't imagine. I would not be able to function.

This situation also made me realize how very selfish and unappreciative I can be. I sit here and complain about the bills I have to pay and the cleaning I have to do. I complain about all that I have to get done, and how this person or that person is going to drive me crazy. I talk about my healing and how hard it is and how I don't want to get up in the morning or that I didn't sleep well last night. I'm forgetting that I am blessed beyond all reason. I worship an amazing God that provides my every need and more. I don't have to worry about my mom dying. I may have to worry about her not being able to find a job, but at least she's alive and healthy. My worries and my concerns are so minuscule in the grand scheme of things. It's not going to matter that Tyler and I only have $35 in our checking account until he gets paid next week. I should be thankful and praising God for that $35, rather than complaining that that is all we have after we pay bills. There are so many people out there with NOTHING. And I mean nothing. And still I complain. Some of the poorest people in our country would be considered rich in another country. I have to step back and put things back into perspective once again. I've been too wrapped up in my world to realize how much worse it could be. I've been to wrapped up in my own little life to remember that in the end it's not what we have or who we talk to, it's what we've done and how we've affected the lives of others. God wants us to love and serve others. I forget that a lot. God also desires for us to praise him in the good and the bad situations and to be thankful for all that he has blessed us with. I forget that a lot too. Keep this girl and her family in your thoughts and prayers. I can't fathom the pain and heartache that she must be going through.

Count your blessings. They are many!